Hello beautiful beings! I felt overwhelmed lately. I consider myself a scholar and the more I study things I find myself either digging for more or hitting a wall. Ignorance IS really bliss. However, I’m never going to be asleep again. For many of you who are awake and took the red pill you know there is no way back. You long for a nostalgic place similar to home but even home has become too much. Fraught with worries left and right you begin your spiritual life looking for something to make you feel secure. The days between having faith; knowing it’s an uncertain security, and literally letting go and surrendering to a possible end of world scenario becomes a bipolar situation with no end in sight. The more you know the more you grow supposedly. This pandemic was a shit-show from the start and it’s left the collective feeling anxious as to when will we have normal again. Some people are running for the jabs thinking it will bring back normal but were things ever normal? I shut down and stopped working on my business because it wasn’t going anywhere after covid. I am feeling good most of the time until I realize the enormity of it all. I feel like I’m working overtime dealing with my emotions, healing mother wounds, doing shadow work, and accepting myself and the things I can’t change. Executive dysfunction takes over me quite frequently and I’m in a state of immovable terror. My emotions sometimes range from mad/resentful to “what’s the point”. Most of these emotions come from acknowledging what I’m unable/unwilling to do or accomplish each day because of my own self sabotage comprised with my daily responsibilities. The other half came from the fact that I was unlearning societal expectations, and the big “why” I was on the path I was on prior to covid in the first place. Unlearning and re-learning is necessary. Therefore it’s time for everyone to tap into their own power within and start on the personal development journey towards ascension.
I asked the “Work Your Light“ oracle deck what I should write about today and this is what I got. I think I might adapt this style of writing to intuitively share what people reading may need.
Deep Replenishment, Leap, Don’t Dim to Fit In.
“What nourishes you, what refuels you’re body? What is nectar for your soul? What brings you back to life? What is your secret medicine? What makes you feel abundant and fertile? Overspilling with life? What is your secret medicine?” Do something that deeply nourishes you today.
I would read that message and consider well why do I need deep replenishment? What causes you strain, requires more prayer sometimes. Other times it takes action to change your life. At the end of my tough days I just get in bed and give my burdens to God like “Lord I can’t carry this anymore, please take care of it.” That is how you can individually rest and be held, strengthen your faith. Your soul came here with a mission but we can’t burn both ends of a candle.
“Take the Leap! The universe will catch you. Life bends for the courageous”. I’m being called to write again and keep going. I should have never stopped writing but my life took a detour. One thing led to other deeper spiritual awakenings, which I will try to put into the right words and share from here on. This is the leap I’m forced to take, and it makes me kinda sad. Deep replenishment is called for, and is the precursor of most awakenings. 2020 was the year The Great Awakening began when we had lockdowns across the world. Masses woke up and realized nothing is what it seems. Leap anyway. Stagnancy is not an option. We have to keep living, and raise our vibration, don’t live in fear. It’s the lowest vibration. Stand up for your convictions.
Don’t Dim to Fit In. “The moment we decide to change or level up it changes the energetic agreements in our relationships and creates some waves. The relationships meant to last will adapt to the change in energy.”
In Aug 2019, I had an intense urge to goto the beach solo without my family while my kids were at school. I’ve loved the beach for a long time but this was a serious trip, it was a calling my soul had. A call for deep replenishment. I needed a retreat to be alone and be myself without the constant noise from family life and kids. It’s hard to leap without thinking about everyone. Some days I wanna go on a trip alone or have some spa days to myself but it means leaving everyone behind and dealing with the resentment that might crop up because when you’re a conscious partner, you try not to take more than you give or feel that you should give more than you take. That might’ve been me dimming my light on some level to fit in… but those beach days I used for prayer and deep replenishment made me realize a lot of things. The most important thing that came from it was that I needed to go to therapy. Every change and chaos that ensued thereafter rocked my world. Those meant to stay did, and those I outgrew fell off, and continue to fall off. It strengthened the most important relationship I have, which is the one with myself. I will share that journey in another blog post to come. Hang tight and apply the message to your own life. If this message doesn’t resonate with you, it was not for you. If it did resonate please feel free to like, comment, and share.
With love and light,
The Divine Catalyst 